The following are some quotes overheard in gaming situations. They made perfect sense at the time.

Villen #1: There's an elf out front buggering my horse.
Villen #2: What? Again?
      David Ternes & Jeremy, The Keep, 24 March 2007, Warhammer Fantasy Roleplaying

Cowering IS an action!
      David Ternes, The Keep, 10 March 2008, Warhammer Fantasy Roleplaying

You tell me I'm too predictable, so I try to be unpredictable, and kill myself.
      Andy Berger, The Keep, 17 March 2007, Blue Max

I'd never drop MY pants in combat!
      Don Moehlenkamp, The Keep, 4 July 2006, Johnny Reb II

I had them make a "find anus" roll ... and so the alien monster was sodomized-to-death.
      Jay Ertel, The Keep, 4 July 2006, describing a Modern D20 game.

Go grab a wet towel, and a cutlass, and get into this fight!
      Rob Gray, The Keep, 2002, Star Trek Starship Tactical Combat Simulator

I've got wood. I need sheep.
      Art Perlman, The Keep, 29 April 2000, Settlers of Catan

I was a god!!! Then the game ended.
      William Hart, The Keep, 20 November 1999, DragonWars

I rolled dice. Something died! I'm not sure what the premise of the game is; but it's dead.
      D. Davis, PentaCon XV, 14 November 1999, Angel War

Once we've got everyone motivated ... we tell them to wait.
      Rob Gray, The Keep, 17 July 1999, Alternity

Aaaaaagh ... Kent's got his hand stuck up a weasel!
      Rob Gray, The Keep, 17 July 1999, Alternity

It smells like baby diapers!
Well, then you shouldn't be eating out of it, should you?
      Terry Hobbs & David Ternes, The Keep, 3 July 1999, Alternity

Man ... this is the sort of building you wish you had a sword and rubber boots in.
      Scott Smith, The Keep, 3 July 1999, Alternity

How long are the hours?
      David Farmer, The Keep, 19 June 1999, Alternity

It is only because I hang out with snobby elves that I have to kill people to get any attention.
      Rob Gray, The Keep, 18 June 1999, Warhammer Quest

That sounds like something a stupid dead thing would say.
      Jay Ertel, The Keep, 18 June 1999, Warhammer Quest

He meant "anti-grav" despite the fact that you heard "eggroll."
      Rob Gray, The Keep, 1 May 1999, Alternity

Does my character have to be alive to use his special ability?
      David Ternes, The Keep, 22 February 1999, Orcs At The Gate

No! Roll a different die! No, another die! You failed every damned roll you made on that yellow die! ... No! ... No! ... See!!
      Rob Gray to Jennifer Pipenger, The Keep, 26 December 1998, Warhammer Quest

Who wants to next follow the vomiting dark elf?
      Jay Ertel, The Keep, 26 December 1998, Warhammer Quest

No, they're just normal warped elves.
      Ken Buchs, The Keep, 11 December 1998, Dragon Storm

THESE are the living zombies ... THOSE are the dead zombies.
      Joe Kogin, The Keep, October 1998, Warzone

Ogre Boy Scouts! We're Tough! Whoooo's wearing green!
      Robert Gray, The Keep, 23 October 1998, Warhammer Quest

But decapitating her would still be bad. Wouldn't it?
      Unknown, The Keep, 17 October 1998, AD&D

Creating a world can take a lot of effort ... [sigh]
      Eric Howard, The Keep, September 1998, AD&D

A woman driver, in a heavily armored, tracked vehicle, in reverse, trying to hit what's behind her. That's an automatic collision, isn't it?
      David Ternes, Wizards Keep, 1993, Morrow Project

Updated 3 May 2000.